August 12 ▪ Day 224

Scripture Readings

Proverbs 21:9
Ecclesiastes 1–2
Mark 4
Psalms 40

Verse Focus (Proverbs 21:9)

Better to live on a corner of the roof
     than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Meditation

Proverbs 21:9 says, “Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” We looked at a proverb similar to this about a month ago. On July 15th (Day 196), we looked at Proverbs 19:13, which says, “A foolish child is a father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof.” Unfortunately, these two proverbs are not the only instances that speak of how intolerable it is to live with a woman who is quarrelsome.

Granted, to stir up strife is never a good thing. We have also looked at proverbs that speak of fools being quick to quarrel and how a person of understanding will remain patient and calm. And as much as my feminist nature would like to believe that the problem of a quarrelsome wife is a problem that affects both genders, I have to admit that women do seem to have a problem with nagging. So, yes, men and women both need to avoid being quarrelsome or contentious. But whatever makes one prone to quarreling seems to affect more women than men.

Honestly, I think there are two reasons why women struggle more in this area. One, I think quarreling and nagging is a response that happens when you feel powerless to affect change in a situation. I would bet that a lot of the nagging is an attempt to get the husband to do something that he has, for whatever reason, not done yet — some chore that he was supposed to take care of (and it may be a chore that the wife does not have either the skills or the opportunity to do). Being quarrelsome may not be a good response to the failed responsibility, but the nagging springs out of frustration and is a misguided attempt to spur the husband into action.

The second reason why I think that this is a problem more for women is because — as a general rule — women are more verbal than men. They are more apt to use words to prick, to prod, and to galvanize action from those that they live with. Thus, women are more apt to quarrel when there is tension in the relationship.

Regardless of gender, however, we all have the responsibility to avoid creating strife, and to avoid being querulous. So how do we do that? I think, recognizing that the quarreling springs from frustration can help. If you feel powerless and it makes you quarrel, the solution is exactly the same as when you feel powerless because you cannot stop someone from quarreling — you have to recognize that you are indeed powerless to change another person. You have limited power to change yourself, but no power to direct the change in someone else. Only God can affect true change. So turn to God and ask for help. Ask for help to change your own behavior, and ask God to change the hurtful and harmful behaviors of those you love.

Father God, when frustration makes me quarrel, when I am anxious because I cannot change the situation, help me to turn to you. Keep me from using words as weapons. Keep me from nagging. Help me to trust in you. Pour out your grace, and your strength. Let us all live in houses with peaceable companions. Through Jesus Christ, Amen.

Today we begin reading the book of Ecclesiastes. It is one of my favorite books in the Bible, likely because this is also part of the Wisdom literature. The book contains proverbs, observations on human nature, as well as some biographical narratives. It is a mixture of poetry and prose. Verse 1 declares, “The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem.” The word being translated as “Preacher” (and also frequently rendered as “Teacher”) is Qoheleth, which means preacher, lecturer, collector (of wise sayings), or convener (of the assembly, or perhaps of students). It is a title rather than a name, like “Reverend” is a title. Traditionally, the book is attributed to King Solomon (who reigned from approximately 970 to 931 BC), although not all modern scholars agree on this.

Verse 2 begins, “Vanity of vanities.” Or, as the NIV translates the verse, “ ‘Meaningless! Meaningless!’ says the Teacher. ‘Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.’ ” The futility and emptiness of life “under the sun (v. 14)” is a theme that runs all throughout the book. It is one reason why many people detest this particular book in the Bible. Reactions to Ecclesiastes do seem to be more polarized, rather than indifferent. Personally, I see the Teacher as someone who has struggled with serious depression — and that may be why I really relate to this book.

Chapter 1 introduces the theme of vanity, and speaks of the vanity of all things, even wisdom. As verse 8 says, “All things are full of weariness; a man cannot utter it; the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing.” The Teacher says that “there is nothing new under the sun (v. 9).” He sums up his thesis in verse 14, as he claims, “I have seen everything that is done under the sun, and behold, all is vanity and a striving after wind.” Indeed, he continues in verse 15, “What is crooked cannot be made straight, and what is lacking cannot be counted.” Solomon concludes this first chapter by saying, “For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief (v. 18).”

In chapter 2, Solomon looks for meaning in different areas of his life, but does not find it. He tries pleasure and self-indulgence. He does not deny himself any desires or pleasures. He makes “great works (v. 4),” and amasses wealth. He realizes that the pleasure he gets out of his labor is the only reward he will receive for his efforts.

The Teacher looks for meaning in the realms of wisdom, madness, and folly. He concludes that wisdom is better than folly, but when he realizes that he will receive the very same fate as the fool (death), he questions whether or not wisdom means anything at all. The inevitability and finality of death, and the recognition that he will be forgotten and leave no lasting legacy causes Solomon to hate life — “for all is vanity and a striving after wind (v. 17).”

As chapter 2 ends, the Teacher concludes, “There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil (v. 24).” However, only God gives the ability for life and enjoyment. And God will take from sinners and give what they have toiled for to those who please him, so Solomon sees all life as vanity. Solomon expresses a rather fatalistic view here — either he is blessed by God or not. The implication seems to be that there is nothing Solomon can do about whether or not he receives God’s blessings.

Ecclesiastes is not an overtly religious book. It speaks of God, but does not speak of any afterlife. And I think this is key to understanding much of what Solomon says in this book. He says that everything “under the sun” is meaningless. So it is. As Christians, we find our meaning in the life to come. Solomon sees death as the great equalizer. But he does not seem to have hope for any kind of life after death. And life is purposeless without God, and without the hope of eternal life. Without those hopes, the best you can hope for is to enjoy life and the work that you do.

Mark 4 contains a number of Jesus’ parables. Towards the end of the chapter, verse 33 says, “With many such parables he spoke the word to them, as they were able to hear it.” Jesus spoke the word to them as they were able to hear it. Although Jesus was able to speak plainly to his disciples, those in the crowds would not be able to understand such clarity. It is an odd thing for us to think about, especially since we have deep familiarity with both the parables and what they mean. Why could the people hear that a sower sowed seed and some birds ate it up, but not that the sower sowed the word and Satan immediately snatched the word away from them? Perhaps the parables would be remembered and pondered and eventually understood — but the plain words might be rejected before truly ever being considered.

In verse 24, Jesus says, “Pay attention to what you hear: with the measure you use, it will be measured to you, and still more will be added to you.” I have talked about this verse before, and Jesus has said similar things in the other gospels. We know about the law of sowing and reaping. Six months ago I spoke about how this verse speaks of the need for generosity and how much we receive is connected to how generous we are. As I read the verse today, I see a different application.

Jesus says this verse immediately after speaking about how a light is not meant to be hidden. And then he says, “Pay attention to what you hear: with the measure you use, it will be measured to you, and still more will be added to you.” And so today I think about the measuring happening within the context of hearing — of learning from the word, of understanding the parables. So the amount of understanding I have, and the amount of understanding I share, will equal the amount of understanding I will then receive. So the more closely I listen, the more deeply I study, the more wisdom I will receive.

Jesus spoke the word to the people of Israel as they were able to hear it. How closely am I listening to Jesus? Am I able to understand more than short stories? Am I hearing the deeper truths of the kingdom of heaven? Or am I giving only superficial attention to the Word?

How do we “measure” the Word of God? Do we count it as the words of life? Do we read it and forget it? Or do we try to apply what we read to how we live our lives? Do we talk about the Word? Do we share it? Discuss it? Ponder it? Meditate upon it? How do we measure Scripture? With the measure you use, it will be measured to you, and still more will be added to you.

Considering my musing on the importance of hearing Jesus in Mark chapter 4, it’s fitting that the first verse to strike me in Psalm 40 is verse 6. The psalmist says, “You have given me an open ear.” This open ear is more important than sacrifice and offerings. It is the prelude to obedience. Lord, give me an open ear!

As I look at Psalm 40 today, the sequence of events strikes me as a bit odd. David begins with praise for God because he has been rescued from the pit. David extols the LORD for His greatness, and resolves to obey and to tell everyone of what God has done. In verse 10, he says, “I have not hidden your deliverance within my heart; I have spoken of your faithfulness and your salvation.” Yet even after God has delivered David from the pit, even after the praise and the sharing of what God has done, David is soon in trouble again. In verse 12, David says, “My iniquities have overtaken me, and I cannot see.” So David pleads for help again; in verse 17 the final words of the psalm are, “Do not delay, O my God!”

I like that the psalm isn’t a simple story of God’s deliverance. David was saved. Hallelujah! He praises God. But — oh no! — now he needs help again. Help, help!

This is what life is really like. We think that once God saves us, that’s the end of the story. No. God has to save us again. That’s the real end of the story. But at least by the time we need to be saved again, we have the faith to know that God has already proved Himself faithful. So even though we don’t hear the details of this next rescue, we know that it is coming.

Father God, thank you for your Word. Thank you for giving us insight and understanding. Please continue to help us to really hear you. Give us open ears. Give us open hearts. May we hear and obey. May we speak of what we have learned; may we also sow the word. Give us insight as we read Ecclesiastes. May we always remember that our purpose is both under the sun and in the life to come. In Jesus’ name, Amen.